Please know that there are many free resources available to you and your family to help you honor your baby, cope with your devastating grief, and find answers. More information available here. Your breasts will be swollen and tender, but there are several options available to help you manage the engorgement and minimize the physical pain, including techniques for suppressing lactation or donating your milk. There are no right or wrong choices when it comes to your breast milk — whatever you decide, support is available to you.
However, the following strategies may help to lessen the discomfort of engorgement and encourage your body to stop producing milk as quickly as possible:. If your engorgement is unbearable, you may release some pressure by hand-expressing or pumping a small amount of milk.
However, please be advised that the less often you do this, the faster your body will stop making milk and the engorgement will resolve.
The more you drain your breast, the more your body is stimulated to produce more milk, prolonging your discomfort. Some mothers may wonder if the breastmilk they express can be used to help another baby. Many mothers have found that this is beneficial as the ability to help other babies has assisted with their grieving. This option may not be available to all mothers. There are only a few human milk banks in Australia. Milk donors need to be screened by having blood tests before they can donate their milk.
If you would like to know more about this, contact the milk bank in your state or territory, or ask your doctor or the hospital staff if there is one in your state which might accept your milk. There may be stores of your frozen milk at home or in the hospital. If you have frozen breastmilk stored in the hospital, you can approach the hospital staff to make decisions about what to do with these frozen stores of milk such as to discard it, keep it as a memento or donate it if possible.
Some women have used their breastmilk in an activity or item to help create a memory. For example defrosting it and pouring it on a special plant in the garden, using it to make breastmilk jewellery, burying some milk with the baby, using breastmilk as a symbol in the funeral service, donating it.
You do not have to make these decisions quickly. You can keep your milk in a freezer and take it with you if you move house. It can take a long time to recover from the death of a baby. There will be times when you feel you have made some headway, only to fall back into the deep sadness of it all.
You may find it hard to get to sleep or you may wake often. This is quite normal. This is the time to be kind to yourself. Talking with others who have also have lost a baby may give you support and some comfort.
Details of support groups are listed below. Further information can be found in the ABA booklet Breastfeeding: lactation suppression. There are also a number of organisations that may be of some help to you at this difficult time.
These vary from state to state. Look in your local telephone book or on the internet for the following:. These organisations may have comprehensive libraries with a wide variety of useful books and other literature for further reading. There are a variety of ways to manage this including: i Lactation suppression stopping your milk supply ii Sustained expressing iii Donation of your breastmilk where available.
In addition to these losses, there are many other reasons why you may want or need to suppress lactation such as: You want or need to wean quickly for personal, work or medical reasons. Helpful resources about breastfeeding and medications can be found here. You thought you had finished breastfeeding, but woke a few days later with very full breasts i Lactation suppression For more information about lactation suppression, see our Lactation suppression article.
Wear a firm bra both day and night to support your breasts and keep you comfortable. Use breast pads to soak up any leaking milk. Glob J Health Sci. Cole, Melissa. Lactation after Perinatal, Neonatal, or Infant Loss. Clinical Lactation. La Leche League International. National Library of Medicine US. Your Privacy Rights. To change or withdraw your consent choices for VerywellFamily.
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Breast soreness and milk production From week 16 of your pregnancy your breasts will have been getting ready to produce milk so they may be large and feel hard and sore. In the meantime, to help relieve the discomfort of engorged breasts: support your breasts with a firm bra and handle them gently use breast pads inside your bra and change these when they become wet put cold or gel packs on your breasts put cold, clean cabbage leaves inside your bra, changing them every 2 hours lie on your side or back and support your breasts with pillows ask your doctor about using a mild pain reliever express a small amount of milk it's best not to express very much or this will stimulate more milk production Reducing the amount of fluids you drink won't reduce milk production, so it's best to just drink whenever you're thirsty.
See your doctor immediately if you have the signs of mastitis: one breast becomes painful or warm or has a red patch on it you feel flu-like symptoms, such as a fever, aches or chills Bleeding It is normal to have vaginal bleeding or lochia after the birth.
You should seek help from your doctor or midwife if it is more 24 hours after the birth and: You are still soaking more than 1 pad every 1 to 2 hours. The amount of bleeding suddenly increases or you pass large clots. The blood suddenly changes to a bright red colour. You feel dizzy, weak, sweaty or have trouble breathing.
You have a high temperature. You are worried that your bleeding is not normal. Return of your period and contraception When your breastmilk production is decreasing or stopped, your period may return more quickly.
Future pregnancy Some parents want to try for a baby again soon after a stillbirth or neonatal death. Where to find help Your doctor, midwife, maternal child health nurse or social worker will be able to guide you through the process after the birth, including having a check-up 6 weeks afterwards. Back To Top. Pregnancy loss Unfortunately not all pregnancies are successful. Bereavement support organisations. It can be challenging to maintain a positive outlook after early pregnancy loss.
Pregnancy after loss is a time that can be fraught with many conflicting emotions. Call us and speak to a Maternal Child Health Nurse for personal advice and guidance. Need further advice or guidance from our maternal child health nurses? Support for this browser is being discontinued for this site Internet Explorer 11 and lower We currently support Microsoft Edge, Chrome, Firefox and Safari.
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